These pictures describe the last 2 weeks of my life....Black & White, Vulnerable, tough, stubborn, dark, lonely, and confused, and I've been listening to Lady GaGa's "Dance In The Dark" and "Alejandro" and "Bad Romance" on repeat for atleast week...

I'm getting to that point in my life that I'm more concerned about me as myself growing as person working on the things I want to change and being the person I want to become and actually doing the things I actually say I'm going to do. I know I talk alot of shit when I tweet/facebook/tell some of my friends that I want to do this and this and it never gets done its not that I'm just talking out of my own ass to get a reaction out of people. Its just that things take time on my part personally and also money wise...I'm not the type of person to start one project and then work on another one and then forget the other one. I've learned a long time ago that, that is not the way to get things done if you want to be successful...

My personal life is in shambles because everytime someone asks me "so how are you what have u been up to?" my answer is always not just once or a couple of times its always "oh just school and work" and nothing else I know its good to be focused on school and especially work but all the time 24/7???? like I don't go out or anything!

+ + +Also to add November 13th marked my 1st full year in college...whoopi...I still feel like I haven't progressed at all...I'm not motivated to actually do good in school I feel like I'm not suppose to be there. One full year of bullshit...and failure how depressing

Planee Jane is starting to become a joke to me...for reasons I really wont go into but I will say that its the reason for my lack of posts/ and or good posts lately. I know alot of people really like the blog and come to it for inspiration but its like now I want to move on to something bigger and better which I am trying to work on but It starts with me first so its like I'm stuck or either moving slowly to get where I want to get

I'm happy to have the people in my life I would lastly expect to be there for me and uplift me when I feel like quitting which were my boss and one of my teachers in college. They really uplifted me when I really really needed it. So I thank them the most and in the end through all of my emotions and failures and how much I put myself down I always try to keep their words in my mind and in my heart to not give up and that I am somebody important...

Sorry for the lack of posts and inspiration...Someone please inspire me send me some good GREAT links to a movie, designer, design, art, book, music...or something in the comment section



defeated.censor. said...

Givenchy.com make sure you check out some of the editorials and campaigns, as well as visuals on the site of the show
Paul Wunderlich is a really amazing artist that I think you can relate to.
i hope your spirits lift!!!
<3 d.censor

Andreee said...